@juliussharpe: If Mary Poppins floated in on an umbrella today, they'd shoot her out of the sky with a drone.
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@maurex23: WINDEX CEO: listen, I can't have you making puns anymore. EMPLOYEE: okay, I just want to make things clear-- CEO: you're fired.
@pungodly: Apparently "I don't like scary movies," is not an appropriate response to being asked to watch a wedding video.
@junejuly12: Nothing like sitting on a chair at your kid's school to inspire you to never eat cookies again.