@JamesonN7: If my mother only knew the things I say on Twitter.......... I'd be sitting in the corner with a bar of soap in my mouth and grounded.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@MarkAgee: I feel like Donald Trump and Bill Clinton have a $1 bet that Trump can make Hillary president and Bill can make her not president.
@DontFollowDave: Zelda is the name of the PRINCESS, the guy in green who saves her is named Luigi, idiots.
@PaulyPeligroso: I stash my weed in the middle of a bunch of Russian nesting dolls so when the cops are searching for it they give up like after 5 dolls.
@JediGigi: Him: You need to work on your communication skills Me: [through megaphone right up in his face] PLEASE BE MORE SPECIFIC