@hazelmotes1: If my son's science project is to see how annoying he can be before I kill him then he's almost done.
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@HatfieldAnne: I used to wonder how anybody could possibly drop a cell phone in the toilet. Used to.
@ibid78: [eharmony] based on your responses, your perfect match is a trashcan.. [me] aww [eharmony] ..full of raccoons [me] omg I love raccoons
@clyderun: The ex hasn't moved out yet. To make her uncomfortable I left a new box of condoms out on the table. She retaliated with a pregnancy kit.