@leechee420: If Reese Witherspoon doesn't call her poop "Reese's Feces" she's missing out on a clear opportunity to be awesome.
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@Angibangie: *Person in front of me using 73 coupons* Customers behind me: huffing and puffing Me: [eyes glued to screen] That one was for $2! Yahhhhss
@notalogin: People who say "go big or go home" seriously underestimate my willingness to go home. Like, it's literally my only goal for most of the day.
@shariv67: The bright side of global warming is that 100% of our great grandchildren will own beachfront property.