@lovemydogduck: If Satan ever loses his hair, there'll be hell toupee
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@jjhartinger: This new generation doesn't knock they just text to say they're outside, so I text back to say we're inside. Two can play.
@JP_theAntiHero: Sometimes I think you have good taste in clothing as I try on your sundress. Other times I think you need a better home security system
@RobDenBleyker: This Independence Day please remember that fireworks are not a toy, they are meant to be aimed at the nearest British ship.
@Nikkeya08: Me: If you take them out of their natural habitat they seek revenge by burning your tounge Sis: M: S: That's a pizza roll. You're high