@ch000ch: if she doesn't reciprocate ur first "i love u", press ur finger to ur strategically placed bluetooth & say "oh cool u love me too? nice"
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@longwall26: "Hello, cops? A man in an apron attacked my hair with scissors!" "LOL sir, that was a barber." "He was black." "We're sending a battleship."
@moose_chocolate: For Easter, I will hide pieces of IKEA furniture all over the house and then have my kid assemble it. If she succeeds, she gets chocolate.
@pranavsapra: They named it Galaxy Note because when you take this thing out of your pocket, the entire Galaxy can note that it's been taken out.
@iwearaonesie: me *sees wife's cheesecake* future me [sent here to warn me what would happen if I ate it] *knocks on the front door* me *already eating it*