@samalmightysam: If Socrates had been a woman, he would've said: All I know is that I have all these clothes, but I have nothing to wear.
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@CyborgHanky: [in line for coffee] Me (in my head): hi I'd like a caramel macchiato please. hi can I get a caramel macchiato? hi, I'd like one- Barista: NEXT! Me: Hello, um, I'd like one, uhhh *stumbling* carnival avocado Me (in my head): god dammit
@corinnemlwsw: "there's nothing sexier than a chick that knows how to work on cars" Dudes, trying to get us to do that job too.
@DannyZuker: You can learn a lot about your kids by simply turning off the TV and talking. For example I discovered that mine are really boring.
@fapanislives: Fun Fact: I love it when Americans whose Great Great Great Great Great Great Great Grandfather emigrated from Ireland say "I'm Irish". No.