@madcaplaughs30: If somebody stops to ask me directions, I give them directions to my house. see you in twenty minutes new best friend.
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@KenJennings: Before the Internet, I guess I just assumed all my friends knew how to spell "definitely."
@Mr_Bum_to_You: I hate it when I mentally undress a woman and my OCD kicks in and I start folding her clothes.
@PeterClayton6: If you say 'my cocaine' really loudly, you will sound exactly like Michael Caine saying his own name. I will never get tired of this.
@bencoffeehall: Ooh. Remove card RAPIDLY, not RABIDLY. I think I owe the lady at pump 2 an apology.