@noog: If someone asks for advice, just tell em to follow their heart. No idea what that shit means but at least they're not talking to you anymore
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@SondraDeeMe: My Medical Emergency Contact is a girl from college who promised she'd pluck any stray hairs off my face if I slipped into a coma.
@Rollinintheseat: When you're talking to someone with no teeth, you find out teeth are also a retaining wall for spit.