@Reverend_Scott: If someone posts a picture of their kid on Facebook making a stupid face, I like to comment with, "Oh, NOW I see the resemblance!"
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@ChaoticBeny: Christmas always sucked when I was a kid because I believed in Santa Claus, and unfortunately, so did my parents. #Christmas
@Sanbel11: Me: NO! Him: What? I haven't even said anything Me: Oh, you looked like you were about to
@eliyudin: "As a side dish to your burrito would you like all the things that are inside the burrito, again?" - Mexican restaurants
@GoldenSpirals: Confuse the cable guy when he finally shows up at your house by telling him he'll have to wait outside until your favorite TV show is over.