@AnotherFunnyGuy: If something rolls off of my plate... I eat it first, as punishment for trying to run away.
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@Ohgoddessitsme: When I'm driving I listen to the country station because it makes me want to get to my destination faster.
@GoodNaps: *in court* Your honor,this case must be thrown out "On what grounds?" *points to defendants nametag: ABookByItsCover* *Judges head explodes*
@internetluke: [i fall down the stairs & break my back] Me: Siri, call me 911 Siri: okay.. I will call you 911 from now on Me: haha nice Siri: thanks 911