@Jake_Vig: If taking off your pants doesn't solve your problems, get different problems.
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@CuddleYourCat: If you piss me off bad enough and tell me to leave you alone, I will take 30 Adderall and send you cat pictures every 3 minutes for 6 days.
@_alexwray: [couple inviting me somewhere] Why yes I'd love to accompany you as a third wheel, it is my most favorite of all the wheels, wheels I love
@maurex23: [drug test] WEED: what did you get for #15? HEROIN: the teacher said not to share answers. COCAINE: done LSD: this paper tastes like crab