@ElizaBayne: If the British had won, today we'd all be celebrating the Fouurth of July
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@aRealLiveGhost: anti-tattoo people saying "my body's a temple" like they wouldn't worship at a temple that had an enormous mural of a tiger fighting a cobra
@Donnie_Fairburn: [Comes home and wife is laying in bed with Another Man] "Hey" Hi "Can I ask you something?" Yup "Why'd you name the dog 'Another Man' babe?"