@theshamingofjay: If the picture you took of the bad weather while driving isn't followed by a picture of your car crash then it wasn't that bad.
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@WheelTod: I hate it when you turn up to a Klan rally and some other guy is wearing the same dress.
@ImKevinito: I wish cops cared about me wearing a condom as much as they care about me wearing a seat belt.
@bobvulfov: DONALD TRUMP (45 minutes into watching wall-e): this film is not what i hoped it would be