@bigmacher: If the Powerball has taught me anything, it's how to turn $200 into $4.
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@TheBigBatman: Do you ever get shampoo in your eyes and wonder what the name of your guide dog will be?
@KyleMcDowell86: "Congrats Lobster Boy, u got the job" [Lobster Boy goes in for the handshake but cuts his employer's hand clean off]
@Lexi__Alexandra: "Tell me why I shouldn't report you to HR?" The doctor yelled at me when I used the defibrillator wrong. "I don't work here" I yelled back.
@praisecheese: This fall on Fox: X-Files Babies. Baby Skully and Baby Mulder meet at a petting zoo when they both get knocked over by the same goat.