@TheTweetOfGod: If "the word impossible is not in your vocabulary", you have a pretty limited vocabulary.
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@autocorrects: Do I turn left when nothing is right? Or do I turn right when there's nothing left?
@SladeWentworth: McDonald's french fries are not real food. Just found one under my car seat from two months ago and it looked perfect. Tasted fine, too.
@Book_Krazy: Pro-tip Ladies, try to refrain from plucking that one crazy hair from his nose while he's sleeping. He won't think it's as funny as you do.