@SveldtSmelt: If the world was made of LSD, I'd learn to walk on my tongue.
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@lazerdoov: Gramma gramma gramma gramma gramma chameleon she's old and cold she's old and coooooold
@Rollmaninoz: Interviewer: where do ya see yourself in 5yrs Me: going through a Denny’s trash bin I: but you might get this job M: haha that’s… irrelevant
@sweetandweak: You could make dinner for a toddler, or you could just cut out the middle man & throw away a plate of food and squirt ketchup on the dog.
@DadBeard: By the time my father was my age he had amassed, like, 30 coffee cans full of screws. I have none. What have I done with my life?