@mybigblondelife: If they just built prisons out of the shit they package electronics in, no one would ever escape.
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@Sarcasticsapien: When people say things like "You can't change the past" I can't help but wonder what it must be like to have that brilliant of a mind.
@RoosterMustache: "Wow this pizza is amazing" Yes, well it's our specialty dough. We soak it in pickle juice. Dill pickle juice actually. It's a dilldough
@click4amanda: War vets with prosthetic limbs are running marathons and I'm busy trying to lasso the tv remote with my phone charger cord.