@psyzod: if u disregard the teeth, shark attacks are actually kinda cute
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@Cryonius: 3 things that makes me stress: • hot days • annoying people • stand close to annoying people in hot days
@Darlainky: "Sorry about this, but I ran out of allergy medicine and it's spring," I say to the frightened pharmacy clerk through my hazmat suit.
@BoomBoomBetty: A thick layer of mayonnaise on all your furniture will remove water rings from wood and unwanted guests from your house.
@Audenary: 'What other miracles can you do?' Jesus: I can varnish 'You mean vanish?' J: *running finger over a beautiful oak table* aha, not quite