@jazmasta: if ur date declines a kiss at the end of the night open ur mouth and let the ants escape. Then say "it's ok I had a mouthful of ants anyway"
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@SteveSuckington: [stranded on a deserted island] Ok first things first, I need to find a volleyball.
@UncleDuke1969: *kneels to pray* “Hello, God?” “YOU’VE REACHED CUSTOMER SUPPORT.” “Who is this?” “MY NAME IS BRAD.” “Are you in Heaven, Brad?” “NO, INDIA.”
@EndhooS: [Blind date] Girl: I've always had a bit of a thing for bad boys Dog: [starts putting on his coat] I don't think this is gonna work out