@bobvulfov: if ur in a horror movie scenario, a fun way to throw off the ghosts is to put a bed sheet over ur head and say "i too am a spooky ghost"
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@DanielAda1960: Napkins used after eating hot wings and then put in your pocket should NEVER be used as toilet paper no matter how much you've had to drink.
@crabgirl_: The people in this spin class are looking at me like they've never seen a girl with a helmet before.
@Sam_Alan33: MARRIAGE PROPOSAL TIP: Get down on 1 knee. Ok, now the other. Great! Lie flat on your face. Quickly roll away don't get married you idiot.
@MaraWritesStuff: Twilight is the literary World War I: you thought this was as bad as it could get, but then WWII/Fifty Shades happened.