@spodermenpls: if ur sad abowt not havin an valentien on valentienz day remembr dat sum ppl do’nt hav an patrik on st patriks day
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@noog: Jesus: I have to die because of sin God: Yes Jesus: Which you created as punishment God: Yes Jesus: For eating an apple God: Yes Jesus: No
@oxnuxo: Fire engines are painted red for camouflage, so they can sneak up on fires without being noticed
@Nyx422: This bum said everyone who gives him $10 gets a "special" surprise in the alley. My gut says no......but my heart says its a puppy!
@abbycohenwl: [marriage counseling] Wife: I just wish he wasn't so clingy Husband: YOU KNEW I WAS A BARNACLE, LINDA