@TheDjinnTrials: If used correctly, Twitter can be used as an antidepressant. Just don't take it as a suppository.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@JonnyGoodTimes: My girlfriend HATES it when I sneak up on her. According to her lawyer she also hates it when I call her my girlfriend ( ._.)
@Carter_TCB: Just found out men don't need prostate exams till at least 40. I think my doctor has a lot of explaining to do.
@ch000ch: [slowly rises from trashcan while 2 friends are making plans without me] i am also free that day.
@KKAlThani: When I'm at a friend's house & there are snacks, all I'm thinking is "How do I eat everything without looking like a homeless person?"