@100percent001: If we both go for the last slice of apple pie at the same time, I will bury my fork in your throat.
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@ChrisRRegan: Oh, elderly neighbor: You defeated Hitler, yet you somehow can't figure out the car alarm?
@The_Amazon_Eve: "Oh, you decided to close your bedroom door with me on the outside? Allow me to sing you the song of my people." -my cat
@thenatewolf: Avocados are like women: soft inside, dinosaur skin outside, big cricket ball in the middle, all the good ones are taken...