@jonlovett: If we can't hit our kids, what's next? A society slowly becoming less violent as we learn more about child development and human psychology?
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@iamk1ts: Men: The Only creature blessed with the superpowers to make Any machine a smoke machine in kitchen especially when his wife isn't home.
@JasonLastname: Being hungry again a half hour after eating Chinese food isn't about the food being Chinese, it's about you being American.
@doublewenis: *seductively feeding you chicken wings while you hit on a hot chick "I'm sorry, I really don't know what a wingman is supposed to do."