@dietredbull: If we had gender equality we'd ALL give birth through our ass. And no more Men from Mars & Women from Venus, everyone would be from Uranus.
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@mattZillaaaa: Whenever someone tells me "make yourself at home" at their house, I always clog their toilet
@mattwhitlockPM: Sometimes I spend whole meetings wondering how they got the big meeting table through the door.
@slimmy_shady: I just read more people are killed by toasters than sharks. So if you're swimming in the ocean and see a toaster SWIM FOR YOUR LIFE!