@donjuantip: If we start calling it 'potato juice', Vodka becomes a health drink. RIGHT??
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@FauxFawx: [on a date with a caribou as a favor to my sister] me: so...did you like the movie? caribou: *knocks over candy display & tramples 3 kids*
@samfromks: Nice try Jehovah's Witnesses but dressing up like cops and telling me you have a warrant is not going to get me to come to my door.
@RidiculousSheri: I'm at my most Disney Princess when I fight with my stepfamily before drunkenly losing my shoe at a party.