@meganamram: "If ya wanna go and take a ride with me / wear your seatbelt" - Nervous Nelly
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@KalvinMacleod: Alanis Morissette: It’s like 10000 spoons when all you need is a knife. Spoons R Us clerk: Ma’am, nobody asked you to shop here.
@teeaysmith: Having a toddler is like harboring a bipolar, schizophrenic, incontinent, adorable, tiny dictator.
@jergarl: "Calm down" I suggested. "WHAT MAKES YOU THINK I'M NOT CALM?" she carved in the side of my truck.
@CopBroughtPizza: gf: i'm breaking up with you. me: is it my drinking habits? gf: well it... me: *interrupts with empty cup straw-sipping noise for 2 minutes*