@pc62488: If you are under 18 years old please Unfollow me, I have underwear older than you.
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@ElKnuckelhombre: Wife: I left the kids with you for a half hour & they dumped 3 pounds of sugar in the dryer trying to make cotton candy. Me: Did it work?
@Reverend_Scott: Obama: Hello Amer- *feels a tug on his suit coat* What Joe?? Biden: What color should the lion be? Yellow. Biden: I'm using green. *giggles*
@Mr_Kapowski: Usually when I try to be slick and say "keep the change," the money I've handed over doesn't cover what I'm trying to purchase
@deardilettante: Him: why doesn't anyone want me? Me: I want you. Him: why doesn't anyone else want me?