@just1fool: If you ask me to go get "Eyetalian" food with you, our friendship is probably over.
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@3sunzzz: My 18yo just gave me access to his private Twitter account. I'm not sure if I'm mortified or proud. I need 15 minutes and the Urban Dictionary.
@chrisrockozfan: Most people don't realize this, but you can eat organic, all natural, gluten-free food without telling everyone around you.
@iwearaonesie: mom: Do you need us to bring anything tomorrow? me: Pumpkin pie mom: Anything else? me: Turkey mom me: Stuffing mom me: Plates
@_ElvishPresley_: Superman: this is my dog Krypto, he has all the same powers as me Louis Lane: even x-ray vision? [Krypto stares intently at Lois] Superman: oh god he sees your bones run