@__candypants: If you break up and get back together more than twice, I will not listen or care about your relationship problems you idiot.
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@NicestHippo: What should we call it when a man is beautiful? "Footseveral?" No but I feel like you're on the right track
@Quartzjixler: Her: Is breakfast almost ready? Me: Yeah, I just have to drain the sausage. Her: Can't we please wait till after breakfast for that?
@Sean_Burgundy_: Just for once I wanna be able to say "It wasn't my fault" without 4 people breaking down why it was my fault