@sarcasticmommy4: "If you can't beat them, join them," I say, as I join my kids in demanding someone make breakfast.
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@TheBoydP: Wife: What do you think our song is? Me: I'd have to say "Happy Birthday". It's the song we've sung together the most. Wife: Idiot...
@juliussharpe: I just hope this Justin Bieber thing doesn't make all yellow Lamborghini owners look bad.
@cbdoubleu: Hulk Hogan: I struggled to overcome manic-depression. Me [as his therapist]: So you could say you had to wrestle mania? *gets leg dropped*
@tarashoe: if you're in a bathroom & person in next stall sneezes, do you say bless you or just applaud like normal? need answer fast too late clapping