@JessObsess: If you can't handle me at my un-shaved, you don't deserve me at my waxed.
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@ErinChack: FRIEND: A ton of people were at the party last night ME: Thats only 14 people given an avg body wt of 136lbs F: This is why u werent invited
@OfficeofSteve: They'll continuously make Fast & Furious movies until it's a bunch of old men trying to get out of a grocery store parking lot
@JohnBoyStyle: Knock, knock Who's there? Wu Wu who? I wouldn't get too excited sir, I'm here to impound your car.
@msmollybee25: This bartender doesn't know it yet, but she is probably going to make me 36 hours late for work tomorrow.