@djangogold: if you can't handle me at my worst, you're probably that gutless Outback Steakhouse shift manager who called the cops on me last night
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@AntiSemanticShw: I think the hardest part about being a cashier is telling the girl buying 3 pregnancy tests to "Have a nice day"
@Vice_Queen: So your face, is it permanently like that or are you genuinely surprised every time you take a selfie?
@jenlaw_11: If a server comes to my table and asks 'hows everythin tasting?' mid chew I like to grab their wrist and keep them there until I can answer