@Wakenbake77: if you come trick or treating at my house you will leave with less candy than what you had
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@DirtMcTurd: *Pulls up to drive-thru window* "Extra toilet paper please" Do you mean napkins? "Sure, whatever"
@Donna_McCoy: I update my Facebook picture to a jail mugshot over the holidays so my family will go visit someone else.
@bourgeoisalien: I miss being a baby and having milestones. No one cares if you're an adult and can lift your head or roll over on a blanket.
@DadandBuried: Take me down to Vatican City where the church loves greed and the Pope's all quitty! - Nuns N' Moses (I'm so sorry)