@MiniiG: If you complain about not being able to find your boyfriends name on a keychain that store will think you have a boyfriend
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@seaninbuffalo: "It's been months since I got laid." - Baby chickens
@mattsurely: *receives get well soon card* Oh yeah, why didn't I think of that? *gets well soon*
@That_Damn_Duck: *Watching YouTube videos* Boss: What are you watching? Me: .... Boss: ... Me: Church? Boss: That's a dog on a unicycle. Me: Praise The Lord!
@RidiculousSheri: I only shave on days when I'll be having sex. I live life as a yeti now.
@DaveWeasel: If you don't like the way you look naked, remember; by the time you have your clothes off, its the other person's problem.
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