@Try2StopME: If you cry every day in your relationship.. sit down, take a deep breath & ask yourself, "Am I dating a Human or an Onion?"
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@Just_Lee_: When I think of you, I touch myself. With my finger. In the back of my throat to help me vomit because you make me nauseous.
@MomOfTeen: My youngest son's dirty clothes sit on the floor, beneath the laundry chute. I admire his hope that they'll bounce up and swish down.
@PaperWash: What's that, turkey? GOBBLE GOBBLE Timmy fell in a well? GOBBLE GOBBLE [breaks turkey's neck] no time for your riddles, in the oven you go
@JoeMande: "Make it look like I live in a Cheesecake Factory." - NBA players to their interior designers