@Sutton_Speaks: If you don't have anything nice to say, say it sarcastically.
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@thejessbess: Got kicked outta Starbucks for trying to order a venti mocha choca latta ya-ya creole lady marmalaaaaaaaaade.
@Dr_awfulpants: *calls Rosetta Stone* Yes hi I was wondering if you had a course on body language *my friend choking on buffalo wings clutches his throat*
@Mr_Bucky: My weird paranoid neighbor, shreds all her mail and closes all the shades. But never locks her basement window.
@50ShadesGran: Suddenly she was on her back, clothes strewn everywhere and her wrists bound to her ankles. She always had trouble hanging out the washing.