@SergioValenCo: If you encounter a bear in the wilderness, sing a Coldplay song. You'll die, but the bear will suffer too.
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@DrBacos: Shoutout to my Cold War reenactment group! We're just a bunch of chill white guys, sitting at a table, acting stressed about the USSR.
@Book_Krazy: Nick's coming over Nick from work, or Nick who thinks he's a scorpion? *Nick bursts through the door* HERE I AM, ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICANE
@ShesARealGenius: [FIRST DATE] Me, opening mouth seductively: "And this is where I burned my tongue on pizza, and this is where I burned my tongue on fries, a