@carlyken: If you ever catch me staring blankly during our conversation it's because I can't remember if it's my turn to say words or yours.
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@MartaEffing: I'm sorry I broke your finger, but seriously, what did you expect would happen when you tried to eat the last two fries off my plate?
@LOUD_Thoughts_: I have a condition that I eat when I can't sleep. Its called Insom-nom-nom-nomnia.
@Sarcasticsapien: If you're going to insult the Amish, do it to their face. You kinda have to. They're never gonna see it online.
@Kyle_Lippert: Black Friday is the Christian holiday where Jesus rose from the grave at 4am to get in line to purchase a discounted HDTV for his Father.