@carlyken: If you ever catch me staring blankly during our conversation it's because I can't remember if it's my turn to say words or yours.
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@BlondAmbitionTO: When I die, before I'm cremated, fill me with popcorn kernels for one last laugh.
@ibid78: "You thinkin what I'm thinkin?" "That we should dance our way out of this street fight?" "Wait what?" "No time! Break on 8! And a 5 6 7 8."
@iwearaonesie: *wife walks over to me* *cups my face with her hands* *looks me in the eye* "Why is there a mousetrap in the fridge?"