@Wine_Honey1: If you ever come home and I'm in your house naked, I'm not stalking you. I just needed to borrow your wine opener, mine broke.
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@envydatropic: *Switches between 4 different news channels for an hour* Has literally no idea what's going on in the world
@rolldiggity: "And if you look out to the left, you'll miss everything to the right. Remember, every choice is also a loss." - Me as a tour guide
@chelliet22: Winter. When trees are bare, and you can see into your neighbor's yard, and omg, that's Mrs. Hood's body he's putting into their fire pit!