@LeahTiscione: If you ever see me with one of those stick figure family bumper stickers it means I'm dead and someone is wearing my skin
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@kelkulus: Adding "family" to words sucks out all the fun: Vacation? Family vacation. Car? Family car. Movie? Family movie. Affair? Family affair.
@sixthformpoet: A sheep walks into a bar. Lots more sheep follow, the barman counts them and falls asleep, the sheep help themselves to free drinks. Genius.
@Parker_Simpson: I must be getting old...my urine flow sounds like a drippy leak in an old abandoned factory
@4ScoreN20Bowls: It is possible to chew and swallow $80 of shrooms in the length of time it takes the cop to walk from his car to yours.