@Phantasmagoriax: If you ever want to watch a women feel herself up for ten minutes, hide her cellphone.
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@Skullcat: What if ants aren't insects at all but are vehicles that even smaller insects drive to work?
@ChrisScarlette: [pizza delivery] Girl: Is there an other way I can pay you? *bites lip* uh HELL YEAH! *pulls out phone* see that RT button?
@myles_morrison: It's easier to get away with stealing someone's stroller if you're dressed as a jogger.