@_NTFG_: If you feed me & have the heat on high, I will fall asleep on you. So to have a much more interesting date with me keep me hungry and cold
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@quikkim: If I was named Edward Normus, I'd use my first name's initial and my last name as much as I possibly could.
@infinityonhi: Anyone else always bring about 3x as many knickers as they need when they’re going away somewhere like oh just incase I piss myself every single day of this trip
@dxblarssonENG: I hate when my tattoo guy asks if he can take pics for his website and then I wake up the next day realising I don't have any tattoos.
@MarkAgee: My mother-in-law's text alert is an entire song. Starting to think my father-in-law's rage isn't really from Vietnam.