@GrumpyCatsMind: If you get angry, just take deep breaths and count to ten. Unless you're angry about oxygen and numbers.
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@EndhooS: Surgeon: I'll be taking out your appendix today Me: [stomach rumbles] Surgeon: [puts stethoscope to my tummy] Appendix: I have a boyfriend
@POTerritory: The only thing more predictable than the conspiracy theories is some people's inability to distinguish Indonesia from Malaysia. #AirAsia
@Samzen_: Satan was all alone with Eve, NAKED, at the forbidden tree and all he did was to convince her to eat a fruit? GAY.
@robdelaney: My plane has an entire high school wrestling team on it, so I imagine we'll crash in a forest & I'll become their King.