@iwearaonesie: "If you get me to the next station I promise I'll never let you fall below half a tank again" - A Memoir
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@Breadery: There is nothing sadder than waking and turning to see the love of your life's face to find she has deflated in the night.
@jwoodham: But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? / Are you still on your iPhone even though you said you were going to sleep?
@jus4golf: My wife said she for Lent she was giving up eating meat. I thought she did that after the wedding vows.