@TheBoydP: If you get nervous when the IT support desk takes control of your computer remember they're whispering "no weirdos please" to themselves.
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@BlindChow: 911: what's your emergency? me: what's YOUR emergency? 911: *starts crying* omg no one's ever asked me that before! me: jk I've been stabbed
@AndrewNadeau0: LEGOLAS: You have my bow. GIMLI: And my ax. [Everyone looks at me, closely guarding my sandwich] ME: You can have a SMALL bite.
@CJhooray: I just saw a list of candidates for the local Juvenile Judge election and I just don't think juveniles should even be able to be judges idk