@BlackCatBettie: If you have a horse and you didn't name it Edgar Allan Pony, we can't be friends.
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@Mr_Kapowski: Wife: I got our daughter a surprise for her birthday but don't let the cat out of the bag Me: YOU GOT HER A CAT? Kid: *upstairs* YAAAYYYY!
@RealGorillaNips: Officer: Do you know you have a blinker out? Me: Yes, officer. Officer: When did you plan on getting that fixed? Me: 2005
@thedailymarker: Husband getting dressed: Me: Purple and green don't go together. Husband: It works for the Joker. Me: My point exactly.