@CakeThrottle: If you lie down on the floor in McDonald's you get to meet the manager
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@theSwellMan: Probably the worst thing about dying a virgin would be all the dead terrorists that are waiting for you.
@NaeemHoosain: 1. Sits in the bedroom 2. Doesn't leave the house 3. Doesn't go out with freinds My childhood punishments are my adult hobies 😎
@mjkspeaks: An important phone call is something that occurs when there's no better excuse to ignore someone.
@MomOnFire: Them: You're burnt out. Me: Yes. T: You need a break M: Yes. T: I'm worried. M: Okay. Will you watch my kids for a minute? T: Hell no.