@samalmightysam: If you love Batman, let him go, because Batman Returns.
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@sammynickalls: ladies: the day after Halloween, don't forget to buy all the discounted blood capsules to keep in your mouth when men tell you to smile
@nickcreelman: Coworker: it's dark already Me: I know, Dan. I have eyes CoW: it's only 5 'o clock Me: I KNOW DAN CoW: it's early Me: THAT'S HOW EARTH WORKS
@CulturedRuffian: Hey waiters-I don't ever 'save room for dessert', I just stuff it in there and pray to God I don't have an accident.